Lending Money!

In the past, several people have borrowed thousands of dollars from me. Of course, they never paid me back. The worse one was a couple from the church where I helped as an assistant pastor. Eleven thousand dollars later, my credit with a score of 675 points went down to 550. Suddenly by the time I realized I could not pay all that money back and it went down to 350. My continuous payments brought this number up to 420. However, I had to encounter still a few bastards who would take advantage of me to take from my account the two thousand dollars my mother had sent me to pay the lawyer for my green card application. My wife was nowhere to help me anytime soon. We separated and she threatened of moving away to Florida. I was homeless, and I was promised an office to sleep in which I paid for with the two thousand dollars. Of course it was forbidden that anyone stayed in the office because they were checked every morning and I never saw the money again not to speak about the credit card debts I developed over five long years.

Today my life is completely different. I have a life of my own, a job, I got a green card, I just traveled to Portugal with my own money and I am even saving to buy my first car in New York. Before, I could even think about this. It was a dream I thought would never come true. I had to leave all my illegal friends behind because I had life to go on. I love them a lot, but now I noticed that every time I reach two thousand dollars in my savings account it will always be bellow my mark, not only because I have to pay rent, or utilities, but because now they keep asking me for money. I begin to think they are imagining me as a JORGE VISA credit card company or a CornerStone Bank Account. I know that they will pay, but keep taking money from my bank account hinders me from pursuing my opportunities and financial goals. If an opportunity comes for me to invest my money I worked for in something big, where is it, If not in the other's pockets? Moreover, they are not paying right away.

I understand they are my friends, but they need to understand this is my money and there are reasons why I am saving it, and they are not respecting it.

Yesterday one them even threatened himself to commit suicide if he becomes homeless, if I did not give him 20 dollars. I know he has no job, but it is not my fault. I had to tell him NO, this time. I had to tell him I can't help anymore. I have goals for that money.

I had to swallow my pride when I was illegal and jobless and pursue the massage business and nude photography. I didn't care what I had to go through. I knew what I wanted and I was going to get it – and I still do. I offered my help to this friend and he responds back "Olvidalo" Forget it for Spanish.

What is this that people now just want to rely on other people's money, and not doing crap to earn a life? I paid bills, expensive rents, I bought two computers, professional video camera, and a professional digital photography camera and much more even before I got my first real job, and I even paid eighteen hundred dollars to get my green card and another fifteen hundred to file for bankruptcy to get rid of over thirty thousand dollars in debts, And I did all this with money of massages and photography. I bought material worth over five thousand dollars without any money or conditions. It had to be God on my side and of course my will power. Where is their will power? I'm not saying I'm the best, but I can proof I am one who survived in New York City. I made it. I know others can too, they all need not to rely on other and find people to push them just like my current roommate who has been on my ass for three years and I too had to heed to everything he'd tell me and guide me even with my stubbornness. I went through the pain and he was willing to go through it with me. Not even once I asked him for money and I own everything I have.